Last week I had a call that went like this:
Q: How would we know coaching was successful?
A: We could take a two-week vacation and not feel like things would fall apart.
Go ahead, take a cleansing breath if you’ve ever shared that thought. Because behind it is a belief (and lack of systems) that interprets 2 weeks away as an impossibility.
The thing is, we all put pressure around taking a vacation. As in, we have a set of expectations before, during or after that sound like:
…I must get all my work done before I go
…I want to be available if they need me while I’m gone
…I need to disconnect on this trip to renew my passion for work
…I don’t want to miss any of the sights (hello FOMO?)
…I have to make sure everyone has a good time
…I’ll dread the work waiting for me when I return
But all these put pressure on something that is supposed to be renewing and restorative…seems a little backwards, doesn’t it?
I’ve done that too and decidedly did not want to do that on this Bali trip. This time, I wanted to be present, listen and notice what life spoke into me during this time away. And it worked!
Here is what I noticed:
Disconnecting from time feels very right.
Twelve days into this trip I realized the familiar internal dialogue of a week-long vacation was absent. You know the phrases, “I can’t believe vacation is halfway over.” “This week is going so fast”. “I thought I would feel more rested.” None of that was in my head.
There was no pressure of a looming vacation finish line.
Instead, I made plans only for that day or the next. Really listening and taking action on what felt fun or adventurous, maxing out each day at one or two activities. And many times none.
This method felt very right. Very welcomed. Like how I was naturally designed as a human. A healthy respite from the amount of “to-dos” the typical American is expected to cram into each day. And as time slowed down, I was even able to release tension I’ve been carrying in my shoulders for years.
What are you holding onto that needs a release?
We all get further with a guide.
I didn’t see this lesson until the end of the trip, which is ironic because 2024 has been a year full of leaning on a guide of some sort, in areas where I typically am very independent.
For example, the first half of this trip I had a tour guide. Tini and the expertise behind the entire travel tour I purchased removed stress, made planning a ton easier and shortened my acclimation to the Balinese culture.
Then while traveling alone, I relied on guides for excursions, drivers to get me from location to location, and the two of the books I chose to read were written by people who are guides in business.
I was in an environment where things were new, I couldn't be as self-sufficient as usual and I had a lot of questions. Guides showed up everywhere I needed them to be and trusted they were there to help.
With a guide, you’re borrowing someone else’s expertise to reduce stress and shorten the time of your own journey.
This personal microcosm revealed to me the next guide I need to hire.
Where do you need to rely on a guide?
The journey to success is mostly about removing obstacles.
One meditation session during my yoga retreat our teacher said, “Our identity is what begins blocking us. Without the labels and expectations, we are able to see the truth of who we are.”
This hit so hard.
I’m a business owner.
I live in a small rural town.
I’m an independent person.
I oversee my parents’ caretaking.
I want my kids to be involved in activities.
I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing.
The list can go on and on…
I don’t have to leave responsibilities in order to mentally disconnect from them as an exercise. And disconnecting is a worthy exercise because each identity comes with expectations, or “rules” you’re trying to uphold. In the practice of upholding those “rules”, as a byproduct we shut ourselves off (or create obstacles) to other opportunities that are available to us. Because we don’t see them, we can’t take action on them and this keeps us feeling stuck.
It’s one more example of how much more free we are to pursue life and work than we often readily see.
What identity do you most need to release to see new possibilities?
Do you wonder what life could reveal to you on a two or three-week vacation? If it’s time to stop waiting until retirement to find out, reach out and let’s set up a call.
Cheers to checking some travel off your bucket list in 2025! Halle
PS:
1. For daily support and tidbits follow me over on Insta!
2. Ladies who are business owners & leaders, I'm hosting a "Winter Warm-Up Retreat" in Puerto Rico January 29 - Feb 1, 2025 and you're invited! Spend 4 days/ 3 nights in a luxury Airbnb on the beach with the purpose of filling your cup and intentionally setting up your year. Click here for more info or book a call with Halle to learn more!
3. Time for a new journal? Pick up a new copy of my Know Thyself Journal for daily support towards your most important intentions for the next 90 days.
4. Are you into individual assessments? Here is a link to take a free Core Values Assessment (CVI). It only takes 10 minutes and measures your innate, unchanging nature. Take it yourself and feel free to forward to a friend, too.